Doth the lady protest too much, methinks?

How many times must one dance around the circle before one realizes that it must forever lead back to the same beginning?

If I understand your points, you are saying that Taken In Hand relationships are more liberal than BDSM, and BDSM relationships will continue to be more popular than those based on male-led variants. I am not sure I could agree with either of these conclusions.

Let us start with comparison of the two approaches. BDSM (as a reminder Bondage, Discipline/Domination, Sadism, Masochism) is a catch all term to describe three related, but separate, sexual/lifestyle approaches to relationships.

The first is Bondage/Discipline which considers various methods of restraint, protocols, and services. This can either be as part of a scene/party, or as a lifestyle. There is normally a fair amount of fetish wear associated with B&D, plus all manner of bondages, from the mild to the extreme. A primary characteristic, is that normally one chooses for oneself how to will express one’s B&D nature.

The second facet of BDSM is D/s (Domination/submission). This focuses on power transfer, rules, rituals, and behaviours. Normally, those involved tend to do this as an ongoing lifestyle.

The third facet is the famous S&M (still classified as a mental disease). This part of the BDSM triangle is mostly involved in scene/party play, although in some cases, sexual arousal is only possible through the play, and so it transforms into much more of a lifestyle.

Now then, all three of these areas permit males and females to be both tops and bottoms, and perhaps switch if they are so inclined. 1-1, 2-1, 2-2, etc, you name the combo and somewhere you will find BDSM folks doing it.

For those new to the "scene" or "lifestyle" their are munches, faires, parties, etc. These events allow people to experiment, try, observe, in a way that is guaranteed to be safe. Plus they have been doing it for decades. They are organized, developed, and have a great deal of solidarity.

Now, let us compare and contrast with a defined Taken In Hand relationships. It only works if the following criteria is met: